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The Psychology of Hearing Loss

If we seriously want to understand hearing loss, we have to understand both the physical side, which makes hearing progressively more difficult, and the psychological side, which includes the lesser-known emotional reactions to the loss of hearing. In conjunction, the two sides of hearing loss can wreak havoc on a person’s total well being, as the physical reality renders the loss and the psychological reality prevents people from treating it.

The numbers tell the story. While virtually all cases of hearing loss are physically treatable, only around 20% of people who would benefit from hearing aids make use of them. And even among those who do seek help, it takes an average of 5 to 7 years before they arrange for a hearing test.

How can we explain the enormous discrepancy between the opportunity for better hearing and the wide-spread resistance to achieve it? The first step is to appreciate that hearing loss is in fact a “loss,” in the sense that something invaluable has been taken away and is ostensibly lost forever. The second step is to figure out how people generally react to losing something invaluable, which, thanks to the scholarship of the Swiss-American psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, we now understand very well.

Elizabeth Kübler-Ross’ 5 stages of grief

Kübler-Ross defined 5 stages of grief that everyone dealing with loss seems to pass through (in incredibly consistent ways), although not everyone does so in the same order or in the same period of time.

Here are the stages:

  1. Denial – the individual buffers the emotional shock by denying the loss and imagining a false, preferred reality.
  2. Anger – the individual acknowledges the loss but becomes angry that it has happened to them.
  3. Bargaining – the individual reacts to the feeling of helplessness by seeking to take back control through negotiating.
  4. Depression – understanding the significance of the loss, the individual becomes saddened at the hopelessness of the predicament.
  5. Acceptance – in the last stage, the individual accepts the situation and presents a more stable set of emotions. The rationality associated with this stage leads to productive problem solving and the recovering of control over emotions and actions.

People with hearing loss progress through the stages at different rates, with some never getting to the final stage of acceptance — hence the discrepancy between the potential for better hearing and the low numbers of people who actually seek help, or that otherwise wait a number of years before doing so.

Progressing through the stages of hearing loss

The first stage of grief is the trickiest to escape for those with hearing loss. Considering that hearing loss advances gradually through the years, it can be very hard to recognize. People also have the tendency to make up for hearing loss by turning up the TV volume, for instance, or by forcing people to repeat themselves. Those with hearing loss can stay in the denial stage for many years, saying things like “I can hear just fine” or “I hear what I want to.”

The next stage, the anger stage, can manifest itself as a form of projection. You may hear those with hearing loss claim that everyone else mumbles, as if the problem is with everyone else rather than with them. People remain in the anger stage until they recognize that the problem is in fact with them, and not with others, at which point they may transition on to the bargaining stage.

Bargaining is a form of intellectualization that can take various forms. For example, people with hearing loss might compare their condition to others by thinking, “My hearing has become much worse, but at least my health is good. I really shouldn’t complain, other people my age are dealing with real problems.” You may also come across those with hearing loss devaluing their problem by thinking, “So I can’t hear as well as I used to. It’s just part of aging, no big deal.”

After passing through these first three stages of denial, anger, and bargaining, those with hearing loss may go into a stage of depression — under the mistaken presumption that there is no hope for treatment. They may remain in the depression stage for a while until they realize that hearing loss can be treated, at which point they can enter the last stage: the acceptance stage.

The acceptance stage for hearing loss is shockingly evasive. If only 20% of those who can benefit from hearing aids actually wear them, that means 80% of those with hearing loss never reach the final stage of acceptance (or they’ve arived at the acceptance stage but for other reasons decide not to act). In the acceptance stage, people recognize their hearing loss but take action to restore it, to the best of their ability.

This is the one positive side to hearing loss: in contrast to other kinds of loss, hearing loss is partially recoverable, making the acceptance stage easier to reach. Thanks to major advancements in digital hearing aid technology, people can in fact strengthen their hearing enough to communicate and engage normally in daily activities — without the stress and frustration of impaired hearing — empowering them to reconnect to the people and activities that give their life the most value.

Which stage are you in?

In the case of hearing loss, following the crowd is going to get you into some trouble. While 80% of those with hearing loss are stuck somewhere along the first four stages of grief — struggling to hear, damaging relationships, and making excuses — the other 20% have accepted their hearing loss, taken action to strengthen it, and rediscovered the joys of sound.

Which group will you join?

This entry was posted on Thursday, May 28th, 2015 at 11:30 am. Both comments and pings are currently closed.